On the action-oriented side of the scale, there sits Superhero Hannah. I’m ready to help, ready to fix—ready to do whatever it is that is required of me to love my neighbors and to love God. This has gotten me in trouble in the past, because sometimes I assume that my way is also God’s way, and then I find out later that while I might have had good intentions, my way wasn’t even in the same ballpark as God’s. I just jumped in without listening or discerning. Superhero Hannah can be performative, too—doing because I should or because I can, instead of because I was called to.

Then, over on that other end sits Over-Achiever Hannah. I want to listen. I want to work on the inside, because I know that I can’t make peace on the outside if I’m not at peace within myself. But then, that desire to get it right creeps in. And that’s a killer. It becomes almost paralyzing—like I want to make sure that I’m doing God’s will and that I have the tools to do so, so I just do nothing until I am certain that I have checked off all of boxes. Whereas Superhero Hannah acts without thinking, Over-Achiever Hannah navel gazes without doing.

My hope is that as we continue to focus on transformation during Journey of Hope, that a pathway to balance will become clearer to me. I so, so desire to get to a point in which I am acting out of my being. For now, though, what seems to be helping me is getting centered. When I pay attention to God and pay attention to my proper role—image bearer, not image manager or image creator—that balance seems to come more naturally. It would seem that knowing who God is and knowing who I am is the first step.