I have been too comfortable for too long. And too afraid to rock the boat. Playing not to lose instead of playing to win. Playing defense or worse still sitting on the sidelines instead of taking a stand on the battlefield.

We are in a battle for lives, and souls, to bring light into the darkness, to participate in making whole what is broken, and as Mother Teresa prayed, to be instruments of peace. I have turned a deaf ear, a blind eye; assuming that someone else will take care of the problems or heed the call. And providing many reasons why it can’t be me. ‘Just not right now Lord’. All the while not realizing that truly I was the one missing out, on the invitation to the feast, to the ‘much more’ God is calling us to for life in all its fullness; a fullness of Him and with Him.

When Jesse shared a snapshot of his peacemaking journey with us, my heart was moved when he spoke about the deep sadness he experienced on the front lines in Burma and his ache for hope. It seemed to be a turning point/a light bulb moment/ a before and after inflection point causing him to seek after/pursue life-giving hope and a way of peace. I want that. I want God to soften my heart, even to break it (if He must), for the brokenness around me, and to change me in such an undeniable way that I must act. Jer’s reminder, from his story in Mending the Divides, was profound. God uses the one who is available/willing, and only needs the tools they bring with them.

To whom much is given, much is required. And I have been given much. And there are good works that God has prepared for me to do, for His glory. I don’t want to miss it because I have been blind, or my ears closed, or my mind distracted or my heart treasuring lesser things that I cannot discern where He is working. I want to join in Jesus’ work. I want to be with Him where He is working. I know the Jesus worthy of my life. I want to live a life worthy of Him.