Describe who or what has most shaped your understanding of reconciliation.
What immediately pops into my head is my brother Andrew when I think about reconciliation. He was born deaf and since we are 2 years apart I learned early on the different ways we walked throughout the world. I learned about places where he was not welcomed and the communities where he was. People who did not want to learn how to communicate with him and the people that were willing to put in the effort to learn ASL. I learned a lot about how the education system treats children who are deaf and met some amazing teachers that spoke truth to stand up for their students.
I am a fierce advocate and supporter of him, …most of the time. I was his interpreter when he played baseball growing up because I was ‘cooler’ than our parents. I sat in meetings throughout college with advisors to ensure he was understood and his questions were answered. I’ve gone to medical appointments when his interpreter doesn’t show. When we go to concerts, I make sure that there are interpreters, so he can enjoy the music. I am lucky to be part of a family that learned sign language and supports all of his identity and culture. At the same time, if I am honest, my hands get tired. I get frustrated when I have to sign all the time because it is work. I get exhausted from interpreting. I have to put in effort and practice to keep up with the language.
So when asked about who has most shaped my understanding of reconciliation, my brother did. He taught me from the moment he was born. He taught me by being his curious, patient, understanding, and loving self. Recently, I was honored to be his interpreter for a book he was being interviewed for. He spoke about his body, his language and how he experiences the world. It continues to be an honor and a blessing to hear his story. He is patient and kind, stubborn and loud, curious and a justice-seeker, and he cares deeply about those around him. What amazes me most about my brother is his ability to forgive. His ability to speak truth about what he needs from us in one hand and in the other grace and understanding for when we get frustrated. He lives and breathes justice, peace, truth and mercy in his daily life and I get to witness it as his sister.
3 comments
Ellen, thank you for your post. I’ve not considered the role of interpreters in reconciliation before, even though I often work with interpreters in my vocation (serving refugees). I think you make an important connection — communication is often one of the most vital ways that humans are created to connect and language barriers are a form of isolation and division that separate us at a fundamental level. Whether literally or metaphorically, it is important — perhaps essential — for anyone who lives in the space of reconciliation and peacemaking to be multi-linguagal.
Ellen, I really loved reading your reflection. I’ve often wished that I knew ASL and I have such a deep admiration for people who do and who can translate so fluently. I think translators bring such an amazing gift to the world by being a bridge, and opening a door of connection, between people who otherwise would not understand each other and otherwise might not even attempt to try to communicate with each other. It occurs to me in reflecting on your post that reconciliation also is a way of building a bridge where there was none, or repairing one that was damaged. I never really thought about the parallels/connections between translation and reconciliation before…Thank you for inspiring new thoughts!
Ellen. Thank you for this portal into your life and formation. To get conversations started, especially among emerging peacemakers, I ask the question: “Are peacemakers born or are they formed?” In this reflection, you guide us to consider the latter and that our formation as reconcilers often happens to us. I’m grateful for the ways in which you have been formed into a mediator, a translator, and a non-anxious presence in the context of your relationship with your brother. I wonder in what other ways you have been shaped as an embodied peacemaker through this kinship? I hope to learn of these practices more from you on the road ahead.